fierce!

    Dear Harriet Walter,

    Here is a quote, which I found relevant to my life, from an excerpt of Airs, Waters, Places, a thing about the effects geography and climate have on societies which was probably written by a disciple of Hippocrates:

"A variable climate produces a nature which is coupled with a fierce, hot-headed and discordant temperament, for frequent fears cause a fierce attitude of mind whereas quietness and calm dull the wits."

    Emphasis mine.

    Three exams to do this week! Let me die. Well, no; let me be fierce.

    Pictures from life soon, I think. In the meantime, philosophy/theology class.

    Post-class PS: We watched the first half of The Truman Show instead of talking. Such an awesome class. I should be studying for my tests now, but I decided to screw around with my blog layout instead. (I was never going to be that kind of college student and yet here we are.) It's blue now. It has a picture of me taken at the Reagan Library and Museum last Saturday in the Air Force One exhibit thing. Doesn't it look perfectly hideous? So amateur, and I can't adjust the size or font of the blog description. Oh well. The brown was getting on my nerves. This, at least, is brighter. I'll make it yellow and white soon or something.

Professor Mine Enemy

    Dear Harriet Walter,

    This is me today after managing to miss both breakfast and lunch. Also, I had two classes.

    I cannot handle an hour and a half of the alarming professor I mentioned before (that is, the one I've decided to be inwardly belligerent towards, the intimidating enemy-professor; Professor Mine Enemy) on a cup of coffee and a handful of fries (the latter generously donated from Upperclassman Kim's lunch). It is not to be borne. Just...no.

    Thankfully he was relatively laid-back today and talked about interesting things, so it could have been much worse.

    Whyyyyy does he remind me of Enemy/Sandy/Dr MacRae from Jean Webster's book Dear Enemy? He's not even Scottish. He's a doctor, yes, but not a doctor of medicine, just a doctor of smart things. Gah. My brain makes the weirdest connections sometimes.

    And I realized today that I really want to just adore the man, because he's so intelligent and passionate and weird and cool, but he's still intimidating and I honestly don't know if I'm going to be able to do well in his class but I really want him to think well of me but I don't know if I can make that happen through effort so really it's too emotionally dangerous to adore the man so I feel like I just need to say "arr hwar gar this is my enemy, damn that Dr S, damn him to bits! I'll show him who's a dimwit who can't keep up with what he requires of us as students!" Except that I'm the one thinking I'm a dimwit and he is probably only conscious of me as a girl who sits in the front row and looks like she's trying really hard to process everything he's saying and blah

    I'm just going to stand over here and build complicated one-sided relationships now ok

    my brain is like a foggy, sticky labyrinth made of dry twigs and unwashed wool

    blaaaahhh fear me