more of The Price

(written at a previous date)

    Dear Harriet Walter,

    So, as one might expect, my sister and I have been watching your miniseries The Price (1985) over the past week or two. It's been...interesting.

    Like, it was all super slow moving for ages, all middle-aged men yakking and your character being beautifully kidnapped and goin' slightly loopy locked up in a dirty Irish basement, then suddenly the end of episode 4 comes and we're like OHAAAAAAUUUUUGH NO OHEMGEE TRAUMA ALERT TRAUMA ALERT TRAUMA TRAUMA TRAUMA ohhhhh the bastard's gonna use that knife oh girl

    And tonight we watched episode 5. I AM SO TRAUMATIZED RIGHT NOW ABOUT THE FINGER AND THE ENDING I WOULD HAVE BEEN CRYING AND BLEEDING FROM THE EYEBALLS AT THE SAME TIME IF I WASN'T TOO STUNNED TO DO ANYTHING MORE THAN CHOKE WITH SPEECHLESS MISERY ON MY ANTI-TRAUMA HAM AND PICKLE.

    Fuck.

    My sister and I agree that there is not much to be done at this point for a proper ending except kill everyone. We'll probably watch the final episode, 6, tomorrow, but before we do I think I need to try and record parts of our traumatized consultation over ham/cheese/pickles. (Asterisks denote a skip to a different part of the conversation.)

    Sister: Frank needs to die.
    Me: Violently. With lots of blood and pain and slow suffering.
    Sister: Who should kill him? Clare?
    Me: Clare. With bits of the jigsaw puzzle.
    Sister: But they've already got Harriet's shiv.
    Me: All right, she'll kill him with Harriet's shiv and then stuff the jigsaw puzzle bits in the wounds.
    *
    Sister: Nobody cared that Andrew died!
    Me: Yeah, nobody gave a damn about that! They're like oh yeah whatever it was an accident, let's talk about money.
    Sister: Poor Andrew.
    *
    Me: Frank needs to die. Everybody should die.
    Sister: Clare should just kill everyone.
    Me: Including herself. And her mom.
    Sister: And Geoff. And Margaret.
    Me: And the police.
    *
   ****(edit: further speculative bit removed - 7-21-11)

    I expect that the actual end of the actual series will not be anywhere near as satisfying.

kill, clare, kill!